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| Niwatori on my Shoulder |
This week was the last official week of summer. The days, as usual, have flown by.
On Monday morning, I fed the chickens and watered the back garden. Later on Monday morning, I received the groceries I had ordered the night before. In the afternoon, I went for my bone density scan; I already have osteopenia, this scan was to monitor the condition and check for changes.
After I came home, daughter and I discussed her year end vacation time off plans. She is required to take unpaid leave for the week between Christmas and New Year (cost cutting measure by her employer), anyway, but, she's not taken any vacation yet for this year, and she'd like to take some time off before Christmas and after the New Year. No, we are not planning to go anywhere during her vacation. We plan to stay home and relax.
After daughter put in her vacation time off request and received her supervisor's approval for her vacation time off, I called the monks at the Temple and booked the date (Sunday, December 20) for my annual year-end Almsgiving. I have a more or less set menu for the Almsgiving and, as usual, I will prepare some dishes in advance and freeze them.
In the evening, we let the chickens out of the enclosure to spend an hour or so out in the garden. Daughter cleans their coop and enclosure during this time and I sit in the garden and keep an eye on the chickens, along with the garden cats! Once daughter has finished cleaning the coop, she watches them for a bit and then, settles them in the coop for the night, while I go inside to prepare tea and start dinner.
On Monday evening, I was making a cup of tea, when my cousin N called with the news that her mother, Aunt C, had passed away earlier in the afternoon. Aunt C had been diagnosed, earlier in the year, with dementia. Her health deteriorated fairly quickly after that. She was in her early 90s and her death was not unexpected and it puts an end to her suffering, but, still, I felt sad. She was a favorite aunt and we used to have long chats on the phone, several times a week, even after she was diagnosed with dementia, until my cousin said she was unable to have a conversation. I will definitely miss her. It was also the second death of a family member in as many weeks.
A couple of years ago, Aunt had told me that she didn't want a big funeral with people attending, just a private gathering for only the immediate family (her children, their spouses, and her granddaughter) by way of explaining why I (not related to her by blood, only through marriage as she was married to my father's first cousin) would not be asked to attend her funeral and not to take it personally. She said that she had informed her family of her wishes and her daughter accepted it, but, her son was not happy about it. So, when Cousin N mentioned that there would be some sort of funeral service, I was only a little surprised; I assumed that her brother had talked her into having a funeral service. Cousin said she'll send me the information later.
On Tuesday, I called my half-sister and gave her the news of Aunt C's passing. I had tried to call my sister on Monday evening, but, she didn't answer the phone and I didn't want to leave a message about the passing of a relative on her voicemail. Instead, I had said I'll call back, later, so she was expecting my call on Tuesday.
On Wednesday, the highlight of the day was M's visit to tend to the garden. He brought me the native California wild rose plant I had ordered through him, watered the garden, and did some tidying and clearing up.
Later in the day, I texted Cousin N to check on her and to ask her for the information regarding Aunt C's funeral and if there was anything I could do to help. She sent me the announcement, with the address of the mortuary and the time (11 a.m. to 3:00 p.m.), but, I wasn't sure if it was a viewing or if there was any sort of service, as well. I figured I'll find out closer to the day.
On Thursday, the tree trimmer came over and gave me the estimates I had requested regarding trimming or removing the eucalyptus tree. They were quite high and I asked him if that was the best offer he could give me as I am a repeat customer, and he said it was all due to the current high cost of diesel, since all his tree trimming equipment run on diesel. I also ordered more groceries on Thursday.
On Friday, the groceries I ordered were delivered in the morning. I haven't posted about it, yet, but, this was another mostly stocking up on pantry items grocery order. Another bag of rice, another bag of sugar, a few more cans of condensed milk, a bag of dried milk powder, a box of ramen noodles and instant cup noodles, as well as some fruit and treats. Then, Friday afternoon, I did a quick trip to one of the ethnic grocery stores to pick up a bag of potatoes (10 lb. for $1.99), some raisin bread, bread rolls, and dates.
I was expecting M to tend to the garden in the evening, but, he texted asking if he could do my garden on Saturday, instead, and I said okay.
On Friday evening, I asked Cousin N for more details of the funeral that was scheduled for Saturday, and if she would like me to bring any refreshments, etc. Aunt, like the majority of the members of her family, was Buddhist, but, cousin N, had converted to Catholicism. Cousin N told me that the first portion of the funeral would include saying the Rosary and singing some hymns and it would be followed by the Buddhist funeral rites. She asked me to contact her sister-in-law D for the details of that portion of the funeral and refreshments, etc., so I did. D said that the Buddhist portion of the funeral will take place at 2:00 p.m. and that the refreshments, etc., have all been organized.
Prior to that, I had planned to wear a black and white print dress to the funeral. But, once I knew that there would be a formal Buddhist funeral service conducted by a monk, I decided that I would wear white, since white is the Buddhist color for mourning, So, on Friday evening, I went through my closet to find an appropriate outfit and ran into some issues.
I have a white sari, but, the white sari blouse I have no longer fits me and I didn't have enough time to sew a new sari blouse. I have one white skirt (bought over 20 years ago) and one white blouse (equally old and showing its age; good enough to wear around the house, but, not necessarily to a family member's funeral). Daughter to the rescue! She went through her closet and pulled out all her white blouses and I was able to select one from them to wear to the funeral with my skirt and she also let me borrow one of her white cardigans, just in case I got cold in the air-conditioned building. Daughter, too, decided to wear a long white skirt and a white blouse to the funeral.
On Saturday, my daughter and I attended Aunt C's funeral services, which were scheduled from 11:00 a.m. to 3:00 p.m. At first, when I had thought that it was a visitation, I had planned to go at 11:00 a.m., wait for a bit, and leave. But, once I found out that the Buddhist part of the funeral was scheduled for the afternoon, I wasn't so sure. I decided I would go about noon, because from what Cousin N had said, about the choir director arriving at noon, I thought the singing of the hymns, which Cousin N was planning to do, would start around noon. However, traffic and a road closure meant a slower than expected drive with a bit of a detour added to it, and by the time we arrived at the mortuary, the first part of the funeral had just ended. I was sorry I had missed my cousin's singing, but, that could not be helped.
The refreshments were served in a separate room, but, because daughter and I didn't want to take off our masks in a crowded room, we served a few items on to a plate and went outside to eat . Then, we went back to the chapel where the closed coffin was placed and waited until the Buddhist part of the ceremony took place. This is known as "pansakula" and, in addition to the regular chantings of blessings and offering of merit to the departed, a piece of white fabric, several yards long, is offered to the monks. This represents the abandoned or forsaken cloth (including funeral shrouds) that the monks used to make robes during the time of the Buddha. Today, the fabric that is offered is new cloth, bought for the purpose, but, it will be used to make a new robe.
Once the ceremony was over, we were urged to take any leftover food home, so, daughter and I brought home a plate of food, which we enjoyed for dinner.
M had been and tended to the garden while we were at the funeral.
On Sunday, I relaxed. Daughter had her usual Sunday chat with her friend J in Hawaii, did laundry including my bed sheets, and sewed on the sari blouse she's making for herself. Later in the evening, we let the chickens out to wander around the garden.
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In the Garden with the Chickens
(Candid Photo Taken by Daughter) |
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| Another Candid Photo |
This week, I'm grateful for:
- Medical screening tests and access to health care
- Being able to schedule my annual almsgiving
- The memories I have of Aunt C
- Being invited to attend her funeral, after all
- Daughter helping me with my outfit
This week's joyful activities have included scheduling my annual almsgiving and spending time in the garden with the chickens!
Plans for the upcoming week include another dental appointment on Monday, the tree trimming on Tuesday, M tending to the garden on Wednesday and on Friday and hopefully trapping the kittens Friday evening and taking them to be neutered on Saturday. So far, I've no plans for next Sunday, but, there is some mending that must be done next week.
How was your week? What have you planned for next week?
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