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| Cinco de Mayo Dinner - Compliments of Neighbor S |
Neighbor S called me, yesterday (Thursday; May 5, 'Cinco de Mayo') to say they were having a barbecue and her daughter N made some Mexican rice; would I like to have some? I said, "Yes, please" and she brought me this plate of barbecued meat, rice, guacamole, salsa/pico de gallo, and tortillas! Yum! I had some for my dinner and there's some leftover for today, too!
I have been keeping myself busy, this week, doing some housework (dusting, etc.), laundry (stripped the bed down to the bare mattress and washed the mattress cover, sheets, quilts, blankets, more quilts...last year, when I had my sciatica pains, I put a couple of quilts on the mattress, over the mattress cover, but, under the fitted sheet, to help cushion me; yes, I'm like the princess and the pea!), doing a pantry inventory (still in the middle of it), doing a bit of gardening (new seedlings are being planted: loquat, tomato, and, yes, zucchini!), crocheting, keeping in touch with family and friends, etc.
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| Loquat Seedlings (given to me by neighbor S) |
I've also been in a bit of a slump, these past couple of days, lacking energy, feeling I am not being as productive as I think I should be, not making the progress I wish to make in certain areas (such as time management), feeling a bit overwhelmed, etc. I even told neighbor S that I am not yet ready to resume piano lessons, because it felt like yet one more thing to do, instead of being something I look forward to doing.
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| Sunflower Seedlings (given to me by gardener M) |
Part of it is I think I'm missing my daughter and worrying about her safety - travelling to and from her office and acrobatics classes in the bus (sometimes, quite late in the evening), the fact that her office lifted their indoor mask requirements (still highly recommended to wear masks, but, not mandatory), etc. She has been doing her best to reassure me, keeping her mask on at all times in the office, going up to the roof garden in her office building to have lunch and choosing to do so in the late afternoon when no one else is likely to be up there, texting me to let me know when she gets on the bus in the evenings and arrives at her destination, etc. Ha, helicopter parent hovering over her child, much? Who me? Of course! LOL!
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| Zucchini Seedling - One of Five! (Given to me by M) |
Part of it is I think I'm letting larger issues get to me: war, politics, climate change (we will be under watering restrictions in California due to the on-going drought), Covid, etc. For example, I had been considering the idea of going to one of the ethnic grocery stores to buy a few things that are either not available or cost more at the supermarket, since the new Covid numbers in my area went down to around 1,000 new cases a day, give or take a couple of hundreds, towards the end of April. But, while I considered venturing out, weighing the risks of doing so against the benefits, etc., and dithered, the new daily case numbers increased. Yesterday, it went up to 3,000+ (today's numbers haven't been posted, yet) and I decided that I will continue to order groceries and pick up, instead. I put in an order for groceries, last night and picked it up, today (I will do a separate grocery post).
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| Tomato Seedling (rear) and Apple Seedling (front) Grown from seeds |
Part of it might also be that I'm letting some of the negativity I am getting from some family members and friends affect me. They vent to me and I'm glad I can be there for them to vent to; most of the time, I am able to let it flow off me - in one ear, out the other, so to speak - but, every so often, I let it affect me. Time to recharge my positivity, I think!
Today, I am grateful for:
- A loving daughter
- Kind neighbors like S who brings me plants and meals
- M tending to the garden and sharing seedlings
- Being able to order groceries online and pick up, curbside
- Volunteer plants!
- Kind neighbors like S who brings me plants and meals
- M tending to the garden and sharing seedlings
- Being able to order groceries online and pick up, curbside
- Volunteer plants!
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| Volunteer Watermelon (foreground) Planted Sweet Potato (rear) |
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| Volunteer Potatoes |
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| Volunteer Melon (cantaloupe or honeydew) |
How is the month going so far for you?
I am sorry you've been in a slump. You clearly have concerns for your daughter, a lot of stressors and the news in general is depressing. Your daughter is well loved by you, so it's natural that you will worry. Times are very difficult. I am finding my grief hard right now. So much going on in the world adds to it. I need to start a grateful list like you do! I hope it helps bring some positivity to your day. My best to you, Celie.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Celie. Grief is a very personal journey that we stumble through, isn't it? (((HUGS)))
DeleteBy the way, I bought some La Moderna pasta, today! :)
I'm sorry you are feeling so down. You are missing your daughter's company which is only natural but try not to worry so much as she sounds to be very sensible. Watching and reading the news is so depressing and has been for the last few years but it does no good worrying about things we have no control over and our politicians here are terrible, not helping ordinary folk at all. I take each day as it comes and some days I feel wiped out but I rest and I don't feel guilty about not doing things. Take care and hugs to you.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Eileen. Yes, she is a very sensible young woman and I need to learn not to worry as much. I've always been a bit of a news addict, but, I need to put the brakes on how much I watch and read, I think. :) I like your philosophy of taking each day as it comes. That is all we can really do, isn't it? Thank you for the hugs. :)
DeleteSending lots of {{{hugs}}} and positive vibes your way. It's going to take a while to adjust to being on your own again without the added worry about your daughter and the things going on in her life. With all the bigger worldwide issues on top of that it'll be easy to sink into depression but it sounds like you are aware of that. Be kind to yourself. Try not to stress about the housework and being super productive for now and save some of your energy for fun things. Even if you're not starting back at your piano lessons yet, maybe spend a few minutes every day going back over the pieces you already know and play for enjoyment, if you think that would help you. xx
ReplyDeleteThank you, Eileen. :) What I need is an attitude adjustment! I think the first step, for me, is to restore some order to my home. I have allowed things to become rather messy and that always makes me feel overwhelmed. It shouldn't take too long to do and once that is done, then, I am going to reward myself with a fun activity. :)
DeleteIt's only natural to feel melancholy sometimes, and not surprising that you feel that way since your daughter returned to her apartment. No matter how old or sensible our kids are, we never stop worrying about them. Do you have a sitcom you like such as "I love Lucy" you could watch instead of the news?
ReplyDeleteThank you, June. Yes, there are things I can watch instead of the news. Except, I'm a news junkie! :D
DeleteI'm a couple days behind so I'm hoping your slump is less slumpy and you are feeling a bit better about things.
ReplyDeleteYou're a mom and it's natural to worry about your daughter but as others have mentioned she is a level headed and cautious girl so try to balance your worry with those thoughts.
I am glad you two stay in such close contact as that certainly helps, right?
I worry about the state of the world too, Bless. It's hard not to. Naturally I know that I cannot personally do anything to change most things but as a caring human it's hard not to be affected by what others are going through as we go about our lives living safely in our homes.
And I am very concerned about this country and the divisions that grow deeper each day.
Thank you, Debra. Yes, I am feeling better, now. :) I gave myself a good talking to and told myself that I needed an attitude adjustment. I need to keep a positive attitude and focus on what I am doing/have done rather than what I haven't done. I also probably need to have more realistic expectations of myself and pick 4 or 5 reasonable things to do (and actually do them) rather than fret about all that needs doing!
DeleteAs for everything else that is going on out there, I am very concerned; for us, for our children, for the future.
I'm sorry to hear that you have been feeling down. Of course you miss your daughter, and you were doing well to keep busy and positive but being up and down is part of life, isn't it? Certainly this crazy pandemic has impacted our mental health from time to time and the news doesn't help, nor the difficulties that others share. But sometimes a good night's sleep and a look at the garden and a bit of "me-time" can help. Your daughter has learned well from you how to be sensible and take care, and just look at how she handles her weekly cooking! I think cuddles with Dancer would be a good idea for you, but he may not think so, LOL!
ReplyDeleteThank you, Bushlady. I gave myself a good talking to and am feeling better, now. I had been feeling a little unmotivated, but, I've decided to "just do it" or JDI as we used to call it. And I am going to keep a list of accomplishments to look over when I feel I didn't get anything done! I did cuddle Dancer, a bit; he tolerated it for awhile. :D
DeleteSending hugs. You have an awesome daughter, and of course you miss her. These are crazy times. You are also a good friend and family member, so of course you hear all the tough stuff. It's a hard compliment. I hope that you have the boost from the garden to help you through this time.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Lyssa. I am feeling better, now. I needed what I call an attitude readjustment and I am focusing on the positives, once again. :)
DeleteI completely missed this post before! I got the one that came after it and did not check further back in case there had been two posts. I'm sorry that I didn't see it earlier. It sounds as if my great gems, such as they would be, are now too late so will just say that I am sorry that things were getting on top of you and I know how it feels when lots of things happen all in one go. It is natural to become despondent, specially in light of all that is going on in the world, and (IMO) fine to step back from certain things and just do what you can or feel you want to. Be gentle with yourself! Piano can wait! I'm glad you had a nice BBQ meal and contact with other people, and those seedlings all show such promise! I hope to see melons and potatoes and sweet potatoes etc... in abundance in due course! Sending lots of love (better late than never!)
ReplyDeleteAw, Lady Ella, thank you. Yes, things just got me down for a bit. I wouldn't admit it to myself at first, but, it helped to acknowledge it. I have now made a conscious decision to readjust my attitude and have started to, once again, focus on the more positive aspects of my life. :) It's not making the best of the situation, but, being my best in that situation. I don't know if that makes any sense, though! :)
DeleteSorry to hear you're feeling a little down. I think it's only natural after having daughter home for so long. I hope you feel a bit better soon. It's a worry when they are so far away. I am sure she is doing her best to keep safe. If she has had all the shots and such I am sure she will be fine. I hope things look up soon!
ReplyDeleteThank you, Sharon. Yes, I'm feeling better, now. I feel a bit silly, letting things get me down, but, it happens from time to time, doesn't it? Yes, my daughter has had all her shots and she is very careful to wear her mask, etc. She is an adult and knows what to do; I'm just being silly! :)
DeleteSo sorry you were/are feeling down, everyone above has given great tips. A lot of it is that you are missing your daughter, as you have an incredibly close bond. Also, I think it is the loss of control we have today that leads to depression, I find I can feel better if I decide each day what I can control for that day, whether its housework, gardening or social interaction and concentrate on that and by the evening look back and invariably you feel satisfied, that is if you choose realistic goals, lol. I call my down days "Little Steps Day"
ReplyDeleteAlso I have stopped watching the news and only read online newspapers they are more informative and not so strident!
Thank you, Sharon. I'm feeling much better, now. I've done a bit of attitude adjustment and hit the "reset" button. :)
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