Monday, April 3, 2017

First Weekend in April




"Two All Beef Patties, Special Sauce...On a Sesame Seed Bun"




Anyone else remembers the jingle?

The weekend, for me, started on Friday evening!


I had gone to the office on Friday and my supervisor brought me yet another bag of aeonium cuttings from her garden!  Now I have three bags of cuttings to plant and suddenly, I feel like singing "Baa, baa, black sheep" (Yes, sir, yes sir, three bags full!)  Bet I've got you wanting to sing it, too!  LOL!  I am planning to plant them in the parkway in front.  But I also want to take a couple of the cuttings and make a planter to take to the office.

I know I had said I'll put gas to the car on Friday morning (after not putting it on Thursday evening), but, I decided to live dangerously and drove to the office and back on only the last quarter tank of gas!  After work, I went to the pharmacy to pick up my medication refill and put gas to the car on the way back.  Gas was $2.75/gal. at this particular station, which is the one I go to on a regular basis as it seems to have the lowest prices in my neighborhood (it was $2.77, $2.99, and $3.19 at three other stations I passed on my way home).  It cost me $35.99 to fill the tank (I budget $50 a week for gas, currently; I used to budget $100 a week when I was driving my daughter to campus and back, a few years ago).

The gas station is located at one corner of a five point junction.  There is a Burger King across the street from it in one direction and a McDonald's across the street in another direction.  And, I thought about that craving I had for a Big Mac after I saw a picture of one in an ad that Nathalie had posted on her blog, last week.  So, after I put gas, I drove to the McDonald's and ... turned around and drove home again!  Yay, me!  I had intended to bake two of the battered fish fillets I had in the freezer for dinner and that's what I was going to have, with a salad.

I called my daughter to say I was home and we chatted a bit.  My gardener friend had mowed my back yard and was attending to my neighbor's yard, when I came home.  He handed me some zucchini and patty pan squash seeds and offered me some extra strawberry plants that he had!  I need to buy some potting soil so he can plant them in a planter for me.

It was 7:30 p.m. when the Big Mac attack took place!  Suddenly, the baked fish fillets didn't sound appetizing.  I called my daughter again and told her what I was about to do and she laughed indulgently.  Then, I put my shoes back on, got into the car, and drove all the way past the gas station to the McDonald's and bought a Big Mac!  But I resisted the fries!  Yay!  Small victory for me!   LOL.  There are 540 calories in a Big Mac and almost 300 of them from fat.  But the hamburger tasted OK to me, so that was good.


Roses from my Friend

Saturday morning, my gardener friend knocked on my door and handed me these roses from his garden!  Aren't they lovely?  

But Dancer was jealous that I was taking pictures of flowers, not of him, and tried to get my attention, standing on his hind legs to do so!  It's a bit blurry as he was trying to bat at the camera/cell phone:

"Take a Picture of Me, Mummy!"

I made milkrice for brunch since it was the first of the month (traditional to have milkrice on the first of the month) and a fish curry with canned mackerel.  Dinner was fried rice.  In between, I had grapes, applesauce, cheese and crackers, etc. for snacks.

There was a bit more family drama over the weekend, again related to giving rides to family.  Earlier in the week, when I went to give her the piece of cake, my cousin asked me for a ride to her uncle's birthday dinner on Saturday (yesterday).  I  informed her that I hadn't been invited.  Apparently, cousin was under the impression that I had been invited or will be invited.

On Friday evening, just as I was leaving the house to go for the Big Mac, my cousin called to ask if I was going to the party on Saturday and again, I told her no, because I have not been invited.  Cousin insisted that I had been invited and I assured her that I had not!  She then called her aunt.  Both aunt and her daughter called me on Friday night to invite me, apologizing and saying each had thought the other had invited me. 

Sometimes, I feel that I am invited to certain events solely in order to provide a ride to others.  I don't necessarily like it, but I try to see the positive aspects of it - I am blessed to be able to drive, it's a blessing to be provided with the opportunity to be of help to others, it's a meritorious deed, etc.  This time, however, I felt sore about things and wasn't prepared to be so altruistic.  I thanked them for the invitation, but said I wasn't able to attend.  I am sure they told my cousin, but she called me again on Saturday to ask if I was going, if I won't change my mind about not going.  I said no, I wasn't going and I won't change my mind about it.  But I felt bad saying it, as if I was being a petulant child.  I almost called her back to say I changed my mind, but I didn't.  I know I am being selfish, but I just feel my family is demanding a little too much of me at this stage of my recovery and I need to not be quite so available to them.  But I did rather blunder through it, didn't I?  No doubt, I could have handled it a bit better.  One of my friends pointed out that I should have just called my cousin once I had decided that I wasn't going and avoided the whole drama.  Maybe I am a drama queen, after all!

Today (Sunday), has been a quiet day after all the recent drama.  I slept in, spoke with daughter when she called to say good morning, spoke with my nextdoor neighbor when she called for our weekly Sunday morning chat, spoke with my daughter again, called a friend, and took it easy.  Brunch was leftover fried rice; dinner was leftover milkrice and fish curry.  Grapes, an apple, and a piece of cake for snacks/dessert.  In the evening, I video chatted with my daughter.  I also listened to songs on-line and watched some video clips throughout the day. 
   

"Afternoon Naps on the Sofa are the Best"


This weekend, I was grateful for:
- More plants from my supervisor's garden
- Roses from my friend's garden
- Fast food to satisfy a craving!
- The opportunity for some introspection
- The availability of songs and video clips on line

I have taken two days of vacation time off on Monday and Tuesday.  I haven't made a firm To Do list yet, but here's what I have to do on Monday:


- go to the pharmacy to pick up another refill that's ready
- grocery shop for the week
- empty the waste baskets/kitchen trash, etc.
- take the trash cans to the curb
- water the garden, front and back
- call to schedule a service for the car
- buy potting soil

How was your weekend?  
 

32 comments:

  1. I really hear you about the Big Mac. Sometimes food just CALLS!!!!

    You don't sound like a drama queen at all. Perhaps you will be more appreciated if lifts are not on tap. You need to pace yourself still, you may not be on the top of the mountain, but you are still on it. hugs x

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    1. Thank you, Lyssa. As I told one of my friends, I was being given another opportunity to redeem myself by giving a ride to family! My reaction might have been different had I received the invitation earlier, before people started asking me for rides (there were phone calls from an aunt, as well, while I was at the office, but she didn't leave a message and, as I suspected the reason she was calling was to get a ride, I "hid" and I didn't call back! Oh, I can be so passive aggressive!) It definitely would have been different if cousin had said, "It's uncle's birthday, if you are going, you can ride with me"! I'd still have told her I wasn't invited (I just don't go to events I haven't been invited to!), but I probably wouldn't have got on my high horse when the invite came on Friday night. Yes, I'm being petty about it. But I am tired and not quite as well as I would like to be. As you say, I am still on that mountain and I am feeling a bit fragile. Also, I re-read some of the side effects of some of the medications I am taking, which might explain some of what I've been experiencing, lately.

      Hope things are better for you, this week. Take care.

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  2. I'm cheering quietly for you Bless. For indulging yourself with the Big Mac and for making a stand with the lift situation. X

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    1. Thank you, Jules. The Big Mac was a nice indulgence. :) I am still unsure about the lift situation - I feel I did the right thing (for me) but I could have done it better. There is a part of me that says the universe allowed me to recover from the cancer and live for a reason and that reason might be to be of service to others and that includes giving people rides. If that is so, then, my only excuse is, I am not sufficiently recovered, yet. I am feeling guilty about my "bad" behavior. I've got to overcome a lifetime of conditioning to put myself first.

      But thank you for cheering me on, Jules. I appreciate that.

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  3. Ha! I remember my sister-in-law when she was a child being very proud of knowing all the words to that McDonalds jingle. I understand how you felt with the family drama, sometimes it seems we are being used as a doormat (or in your case chauffeur). Maybe now, your relatives will realize what a service your driving them is.

    Hugs
    Jane

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    1. Thank you for understanding, Jane. As I told my friend, if I have to be a doormat, I don't have to put "Welcome" on it, as well! LOL. No, my family will simply think I am being unreasonable and moody, that's all. :) They'll be sorry for my cousin who had to find herself another ride (she can drive, but doesn't like to drive, so won't drive; I'm not too sympathetic because she has a husband and a daughter who can drive her). The family will cold-shoulder me for awhile (I probably won't be invited to Easter dinner!), but I'll probably be informed who is hosting the April prayer gathering and when. And I'll probably be chided for my behavior, by the aunts, at the prayer gathering, if I attend it. This is usually how it goes in my family. Have I mentioned that I love them all? Which is why I'll probably be the first one to mend fences with an offer of a ride to some place to my cousin and we'll start the cycle all over again! :D

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  4. I'm glad you finally had your Big Mac and were able to enjoy it, and that you decided what to do with your own time even though it was denying someone a ride. I don't think that you should feel guilty about anything, you didn't lie... you hadn't been formally invited and then your cousin assumed that you'd give her a ride when you were. Sounds to me like a lot of assumptions were made by other people, and why should you be responsible or feel guilty for other people's assumptions?

    Have a great week, Bless! The roses look gorgeous in that vase. Did Dancer leave them alone?

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    1. Thank you, Nathalie. I am now trying to resist the lure of a cinnamon roll! LOL. No, I didn't lie, but I was being selfish and I feel guilty about that.

      Yes, Dancer actually left the flowers alone, this time! He did look and mew at them, but he hasn't tried to climb up onto the mantel to get at them, yet!

      Hope you, too, have a great week, Nathalie.

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  5. Hello Bless. Today I woke up wanting McD's, but the budget said no. So I cut a little larger than usual rice crispy treat to "make up for it" for lunch today.
    I can relate to family drama - and I think you did well (I would have done the same thing and then thought I should have done it better too). It is hard to be a good steward and yet take a little care of oneself with some people.
    The roses are beautiful and so is your kitty. What a wonderful way to spend a Sunday!
    Hugs, Jen

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    1. Jen, thank you. :) The rice crispy treat is a good alternative, I think! Dancer is actually my daughter's kitty, but she couldn't take him with her when she went off to do her master's. The apartment management allowed pets, but we would have had to pay extra for the privilege, and her rent is high enough as it is! So, he's here with me. :)

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  6. Beautiful roses!

    Good for you for sticking to your guns. It shouldn't feel like an obligation to go especially just so you can drive others. It's nice to offer a ride once in a while but too much and you are taken for granted!

    Lol that you gave in to your Big Mac attack. I'm not much of a fast food person. I don't eat any meat except for a cod fillet now and then. It's been so long I try to stay away from any animal stocks too - upset my stomach. Unfortunately lots of places use animal fats or cook close to meat and just upset my stomach.

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    1. Thank you, Sharon. They are gorgeous roses, aren't they? You are probably healthier for not eating fast food and meat.

      Yes, unfortunately, that is exactly how it feels at times - an obligation to go so I can drive others. I am usually able to shrug and laugh it off, but this time, I am feeling a bit sore because these particular members of the family just weren't there for me with offers of rides when I was undergoing treatments and couldn't drive myself. There were no inquiries of how was I going to get to my treatments, either. They just assumed that I'd find a way. And I did, even if it meant I drove myself. There was one time when I drove myself to a blood test when I knew that I shouldn't be behind a wheel because of how I was feeling. I scared myself and I know I scared the lab workers who were very concerned for me. It was prayers and sheer self will that took me to the clinic and back, safely. Again, I know I am being petty and sorry for myself, and I hate that, but, I am being honest about it. Sigh. It's not always easy to let bygones be bygones.

      Hope spring is making itself felt over there, Sharon, and you are enjoying better weather. Take care.

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  7. You made me laugh.. how fun!!
    Now..you passed up the big mac crave, made it home , and the attack hit again..hahahahaa. Now.. I am so happy you drove and got the big mac. That was a REAL craving, that wasn't going away. smile

    Our McDonal's just came up with a Junior Mac and a triple mac.. I love the little mac, it has the special sauce and taste just like the regular mac, but it only has 2 pieces of bread versu 3. Saves a good bit on calories.. BTY...I had a Bic Mac attack the other day too.smile. you have the song dancing in my head, and it won't go away.ha

    Sorry you were treated that way, with family wanting a ride. I really understand how you feel.. You have been through a lot and still not completely well. You need to take it easy.. SOme times our families, take advantage of our generosity.. Proud you stood firm this time..
    Have a blessed week.

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    1. Thank you, Judy. I tend to be an emotional eater. That's how I deal with stress. Some people drink, others do drugs, I eat. And I have been under some stress about this whole ride situation with the family. So, when the 2nd Big Mac craving hit me, I decided to give in. I was in a "treat myself" mood. I haven't checked, but, they have the junior mac and triple mac, here, too, I think. If so, then, maybe the jr. mac (460 cal.) might be the way to go. But, hopefully, these fast foods cravings will be few and far apart. Otherwise, I'll be able to fit into all those clothes that are too big now! :D

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  8. Hi! Congrats on your big mac! ha! After your family drama you might deserve another one! I hope they stop using you for rides, because I am sure that is hurtful! It is so nice you can confide in your daughter; I'm sure that brings you great joy. Beautiful roses. Andrea

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    1. Thank you, Andrea. That's just what I am afraid of! That I'll end up wanting another burger, as I am definitely an emotional eater! But I shall compensate with a nice big salad, today. :)

      As for the family drama, I keep feeling that I was tested and I failed. :( Every day, I pray for the ability to handle things with grace. But, so often, I look back and think, I didn't handle that with a lot of grace. But, hopefully, this was just another "teaching moment" to show me that I need to improve.

      Hope you are having a lovely day, Andrea.

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  9. Even if it was an honest-to-goodness oversight on their part, they couldn't possibly expect that you would jump at the chance of attending at the last moment. You had chosen your evening activity, even if it was going to bed early. It was a Friday night after all. You handled it far more graciously than most people would have. And that is my two cents.

    Yay for free roses, seeds and cuttings for the garden, and free videos for on-line viewing.

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    1. Susan, it is so lovely to "hear" from you, again! (((HUGS))) Thank you for your comment. As I just said in my reply to Andrea's comment above, every day, I pray for the ability to handle things with grace and often, I look back and think I could have handled it with more grace! I feel I just failed a test. The more gracious thing to have done would have been to accept the invitation and driven my cousin; that's what was expected of me. But, I guess I am not quite ready to be that accommodating, yet.

      I hope you are doing as well as can be expected, Susan. Again, may I say that I am delighted to see you commenting? Thank you!

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  10. Sometimes in life you just have to pull under the Golden Arches and let whatever needs to happen, happen!

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  11. LOL, Anne, I am so going to post that on my facebook page, with a picture of the burger! It is so true, isn't it? Thank you!

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  12. Yes you were certainly living dangerous driving to work and home on your last 1/4 tank of gas. 😀

    You are not selfish or a drama queen. Your cousin was rude to keep pressing you for a ride. No need for you to feel guilty or worry about how you handled the situation.

    I love your roses, beautiful vase and sweet kitty.

    Saturday I was in a little bit of a Spring cleaning mood and made a start on my kitchen cabinets. Ended up with a big box of glasses to donate and some baking supplies that perhaps my daughter can use. Sunday hubby cut the grass (first time this year) and I weeded a couple of flower beds.

    Enjoy your vacation days.

    Sandy

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    1. Thank you, Sandy. It is the season for spring cleaning, isn't it? Sounds like you did well with cleaning out the kitchen cabinets. I am forever breaking glasses, so I have a whole bunch of mis-matched ones! Does your daughter live near you? I'm sure she'll appreciate the baking supplies (your grandson, too, as I'm sure he'll be happy to eat whatever his mom bakes!)

      Sounds like it is time to start gardening! I'm glad the weather was nice and you were able to spend some time in the garden.

      Hope you have a lovely week, Sandy. By the way, have you decided what you were going to make for Easter dinner? Earlier, you were saying you were thinking about it. Are you making the meal and having your family over? I'm being nosy, aren't I? But I like knowing what others are doing! :)

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    2. My daughter lives about a 30 minute or so drive from me depending on the traffic. Her two boys age 14 and almost 17 can really eat. Yes, it is her little family along with SIL mother visiting from Florida who are coming for a late Easter lunch. Because we all tend to eat a big breakfast served at our respective churches on Easter Sunday we do not want lunch very early. I am strongly leaning toward a roast chicken, something that hubby can eat and go from there.

      Wish I could gift you some of the many glasses we have from the days when there were five at home. Both my boys live away, one on the East coast and the other on the West coast. I miss them both so much.

      Sandy

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    3. Sandy, I'm glad your daughter lives fairly close to you. Sorry your sons live so far from you and in opposite directions, too! Hope they keep in touch with you on a regular basis.

      Oh, lots of china and glasses when it's a large family, isn't it? When my mother married my father, she became step-mother to 5 children, aged 5 to 13 (their mother had died). Then, when I arrived, approx. 3 years later, we were a family of 8! We remained a family until my father died and for about 3 years after that. Towards the end, however, there was a lot of conflict between my mother and my half-siblings (they didn't like the fact that my mother, who was widowed at 42, was seeing someone). We stayed together until my half-sister got married and then, we broke up the household. It was rather ugly and they took away everything that my mother couldn't prove was hers because she purchased it with her money or bought back from the estate, including the china and glasses and cutlery! I still remember my mother asking her aunt and cousin, who were coming to tea on the day the moving trucks left, to bring some teaspoons with them as we didn't have any! Oh, but I could write a book! :D

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  13. What an entertaining blog this was, complete with Dancer hogging the show. I chuckled at the Big Mac saga, my reaction was similar to Anne's, "a gal's gotta do what a gal's gotta do!" So glad it tasted good to you.

    You did well to back off from the party that you weren't even invited to, until (it seems) someone didn't want to drive herself and thought up a good alternative. You will gain their respect by not being a doormat/chauffeur every time they call.

    Had a lovely visit with our little family yesterday and Grandma did her thing and made taffy on the snow, which they loved, of course. Today I had a pleasant walk with a friend and her dog, followed by a cup of tea together. When it was time for her to leave, the dog decided she didn't want to go! We almost got ourselves a dog, but my friend would miss her too much.

    Bushlady

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    1. Thank you, Bushlady. Glad you enjoyed the post! Do you remember the old Queen of Toss? Who used to wear a moth eaten ermine robe and a tarnished crown and used to throw hissy fits all the time? I think she made an appearance over the weekend! ;)

      Oh, did you make the taffy like it was described in the Little House books by Laura Ingalls Wilder? They poured the boiled maple syrup on pans of snow and it hardened to candy. In the book, the little girls were allowed one piece of candy to eat after it was made and the rest were put away for when company came for Christmas. I hope your granddaughter was allowed more than one piece of taffy!

      That's too funny about the dog wanting to stay behind with you! She must have loved your place and being fussed over, no doubt.

      Hope you have a lovely week ahead of you, Bushlady.

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    2. Yes, we had a pan of clean snow and I poured the thickened syrup onto it and granddaughter certainly got plenty!
      Bushlady

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    3. Yum! It sounds delicious! Pure maple sugar candy!

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  14. I enjoyed your post. I sometimes read your blog, I have a tendency to read a lot!
    Just my two cents, I believe we are called to serve, but not as door mats.
    Don't over think how you handled the situation.
    She was pressing you, and knew it.
    Could have been the Lord wanted you to not go to the party.
    You can bet your buttons as soon as she wants to be catered to, she will most likely call on you, again. If she can drive herself, let her, or her family.
    Dr. Charles Stanley says, do your best, and leave the consequences up to God.
    It may well be, He is trying to teach her to serve someone, not be served.
    Sometimes the best gift you can give to yourself is to just so no kindly, but no nonetheless.
    Healing is work, and drama is no get well party.
    Hugs, blessings, Annie.

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    1. Thank you, Annie. There is a lot of wisdom in what you said. It was very kind of you to leave a comment; I hope you'll do so, again. Have a lovely week.

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  15. Oh Bless, I am just now reading this as I am so behind on blog reading and commenting. I am sorry that your family just "expects" you to drive them when they can drive themselves or have their spouse or child drive them if they do not want to. I'm proud of you for standing your ground, especially in such an awkward situation.

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    1. Thank you, Debbie. I guess we all have family issues from time to time! I love them all dearly and am glad to help out when I can, but there are times when I'd rather not be at their beck and call! Or, made to feel like that, if you know what I mean. They do think they are being considerate ("If you are going, can you take me", etc.), but it makes me feel obliged to do so and, at this present time, I just don't feel up to it. But then, I feel so guilty about it afterwards, that I think it would have been better if I had just obliged. You know?

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