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| December Rose |
On Saturday, I attended the memorial for Aunt T. I hadn't attended her funeral, one year ago, due to Covid restrictions and concerns; I decided to attend the memorial service, since I was now vaccinated and had received the booster, too. I figured that the Church service would be safe enough to attend (I'd wear my mask the whole time). I didn't plan to attend the reception, afterwards, as it would be indoors and being with 80 guests who would be unmasked as they ate and drank and talked was beyond my comfort level.
The invitation to the memorial service and reception stated, "Leave your tears behind. Come sparkle and shine". I debated what to wear to the memorial service. If it had been a Buddhist memorial service, everyone would have been expected to dress in white, as that is our color for mourning. But, Aunt T had been Catholic; wouldn't black be the appropriate color, then? But, what about the "sparkle and shine" part? Also, isn't there a rule about not wearing shiny outfits in the morning (the memorial service was at 10:30 a.m.)? Plus, it was a cool morning (52F, which is cold for me!) and I wanted to be warmly dressed. In the end, I chose to wear a long black skirt (I've had it for over 20 years) and a cream colored sweater which had "pearls" sewn down the front. I wore a burgundy and gold shawl which Aunt T had given me, over the sweater; it provided the necessary "sparkle and shine". That left me with trying to figure out what shoes to wear! I have one pair of black shoes that I have had for years and have been worn so often that they are looking very, very shabby and it's not an exaggeration. Those shoes are ready to be tossed! Sandals weren't an option as it was too cold for sandals. In the end, I wore my black ankle boots and the long skirt covered their tops. I think I need to shop for a pair of replacement black shoes.
30 minutes before I was planning to leave to go to the memorial service, cousin P called me. Her daughter was not well and couldn't take P to the service; could I give her a ride? I said yes, of course. While I was on the phone with P, cousin V (Aunt T's older daughter) called to say that P had called her saying she didn't have a ride and would I mind giving her a ride?! I told V that I was on the other phone with P and yes, I will give her a ride. Apparently P's daughter was supposed to have given the reading, but, since she was unable to be there, V's daughter did the reading, instead. Since she was Aunt T's oldest granddaughter, I think it was just how it should have been (not that anyone asked my opinion!)
There were quite a few people at the church, but, almost everyone was wearing a mask. Afterwards, people mingled a bit in the lobby of the church and outside, greeting one another. I said hello to several members of the extended family and family friends, many of whom I hadn't seen since before the pandemic. Then, I made sure that cousin P had a ride to the reception with another cousin, made my excuses to cousin V even as her husband tried to persuade me to change my mind and come to the reception, and came home.
My daughter didn't attend the service because she was not feeling quite up to it. After I came home, I warmed up some leftovers for brunch for us (daughter had pasta with sauce, I had a paratha with the last of the turkey curry - turkey week stretched out to almost two!) and we spent the rest of the day, relaxing. Cousin P called me after she came home from the reception to thank me for giving her a ride. Later, I chatted with friend R. Dinner was rice, spicy potatoes, ground beef, corn, and curried green beans, with zucchini chutney.
Today, Sunday, I decided that the house could do with a bit of a sparkle and shine! I dusted, vacuumed, tidied up a bit, put away all the groceries bought from the Sri Lankan store, and picked a fresh rose from the garden for the living room altar.
Daughter is feeling much better, today, and needed only one nap instead of multiple naps!
Neighbor T called for our Sunday chat and we discussed our recent falls (apparently, she fell inside her house), and compared our bruises (I've a lovely purple knee and she said she has a bruise running down her fingers to her palm as she was holding a bag of groceries when she fell). We rang off telling each other to be careful! LOL.
I made scrambled eggs, bacon, and toast for brunch, today. Dinner was leftovers from last night. I need to meal plan for the week ahead - there's more ground beef leftover which can be made into something (curry puffs?) and maybe I'll make a fish curry one day (to have with rice and vegetables) and a ham tetrazzini/casserole which will provide a couple of meals. Well, that wasn't too difficult, was it?
This weekend, I am grateful for:
- Being able to attend Aunt T's memorial
- Being able to give cousin P a ride
- A safe drive there and back
- Daughter is feeling much better
- December roses
This weekend's joyful activities included meeting family and friends I haven't met since the pandemic began.
- Mop kitchen
I am glad you were able to attend your Aunt's service. I like the theme of sparkle and shine for her life's celebration.
ReplyDeleteI think you came up with a nice outfit topping it off with the scarf your aunt had given you.
It is raining here this morning. I was going to do the last of the leaf raking as this Wednesday's pick up will be the last for a while but I guess that will be put off until tomorrow.
Thank you, Debra. Aunt T did like a bit of sparkle and shine! Life was to be lived and enjoyed, she'd say. :)
DeleteA rainy day is not so good for raking leaves. Stay indoors where it is warm and dry! We have some rain in the forecast for Thursday morning! We need the rain!
I think your Auntie would have been very pleased with your attending the memorial service for her along with your choice of sparkle & shine. I've never heard of the rule about not wearing shiny in the morning. Glad your daughter is feeling better.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Mary-Lou. Aunt would have probably found fault with me for not being sufficiently sparkly and shiny! LOL! "Where are your earrings?", she would have asked (I forgot to wear any). "Where is your necklace?" (There was one particular necklace she had always liked to see me wear; I forgot to wear that, too!) The no shiny clothes during the day time was something my mother and some aunts used to say. I think it might have had something to do with the different cultures and ethnic groups in the country at the time.
DeleteDaughter is feeling well, today, thank you. :)
From my experience, I don't see that many people wearing black at funerals any more. I don't know if that's a regional thing or not.
ReplyDeleteI think a lot of people are moving away from mourning the loss of a loved one to celebrating their lives. I still find it odd to wear brightly colored clothes to a funeral or memorial. I'm old fashioned, that way. :)
DeleteGood news that your daughter is starting to feel better. How do you feel about attending the memorial service now that you've been? I mean in terms of possible exposure to the virus and trying to second guess whether you did the right thing - at least, that's what I'd be doing now but maybe you're not as much of a worrier as me!
ReplyDeleteThe rose is beautiful x
Thank you, Eileen; daughter is feeling almost back to normal, this morning.
DeleteI am feeling OK with my decision to attend the memorial service. I wore an N95 mask and, since it was 2 weeks after my booster, I felt my immunity was good. I haven't been second guessing my decision, but, I would have been a nervous wreck if I had allowed myself to be persuaded to attend the reception!
I was very pleased to see the rose! There might be one more rose, a bit later this month, and then, M will prune the rose plants in January.
I am glad you were able to go to the memorial service. I have to go to my SIL's mom's funeral tomorrow and am very thankful they have planned a graveside service. I will fell much better about attending than I would have at an indoor service.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Anne. I, too, would have preferred to attend an outdoor service, but, I am OK with having attended the indoor memorial service. The main church door was left open during the service and I sat towards the back. I would not have felt comfortable attending the reception, however!
DeleteMy condolences to your SIL and family.
Your outfit for the memorial sounded very attractive and appropriate for the occasion. I had to chuckle at your shoe dilemma, I have shoe problems but eventually found a new cobbler some miles away and my black shoes are there right now. A long skirt is a great coverup for boots. Of course here we are into boots or short winter booties. We had a load of heavy wet snow fell overnight, so the driveway had to be ploughed for the first time. If I had time I would make a snowman, the snow is just right. But squirrels need to be fed and the porch had to be swept, as well as indoor housework!
ReplyDeleteThank you, Bushlady. I was laughing at myself because, there I was with a more than ample wardrobe feeling like I had nothing appropriate to wear for the occasion! My black and white dress would have been fine, but, it was more of a summer dress than a winter one. Had it been a warmer winter day, I'd have been OK in it, with a jacket. I did have a black sweater with beads and sequins that another aunt had given me, but, I wasn't sure if that would have been appropriate or not (more evening party wear than memorial service in a church, in my opinion). But, I need not have worried! There were two family members wearing sequined dresses that were very shiny and sparkly! :D
DeleteI'm glad you found a cobbler to fix your shoes. I don't think any cobbler would even look at my shoes! :D My shoes had a "felt" look, originally, but the felt has worn off in places, the bows have been hot glued on after they came off, and I've had to clean Dancer spit ups on them a couple of times, too! They just need to be tossed in the trash can!
Ooh, next time it snows, you have to make a snowman! :)
I'm glad your daughter is feeling better. I understand about the shoes. I had to replace some recently also.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Debbie. Yes, one of these days, I will gather my courage up in both hands and shop for a pair of shoes! I can't buy shoes online; I need to try them on.
DeleteSorry that you had a fall; I hope you are healing quickly. Aren't leftovers wonderful? I eat them almost every day. They really help the budget, and are easy to reheat and enjoy. You meals sound delicious.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Stephenie. I got a bit scraped and bruised, but, otherwise, OK. Leftovers are actually planned overs! Cook once and eat twice or, even, trice! :D Fortunately, neither my daughter, nor I, mind eating leftovers. :)
DeleteIt sounds like your aunt had a nice service and it's good you were able to attend that. My sister's memorial service will be Saturday after next, just a small gathering of family and friends at her church. We won't have a reception due to Covid concerns. Her ashes won't be buried there, so we might do a reception when we do that, assuming Covid is no longer a concern. But the way things are going, I don't see this pandemic going away anytime soon. I'm glad you are well (but sorry for the bruising) and that your daughter is feeling better. Best, Celie
ReplyDeleteI think aunt would have been happy with the service. :) I will be thinking of you, Celie, the Saturday after next. (((HUGS)))
DeleteA fitting tribute. I'm never quite sure what to wear for a funeral these days, let alone a memorial service. Your choice of outfit sounds lovely.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad your daughter is feeling a bit better. X
Thank you, Jules. It seems that I am either overdressed or underdressed at occasions, these days! :D
Delete"Leave your tears behind. Come sparkle and shine". That sounds wonderful for a memorial service. Your outfit sounds about right, it is difficult to know what to wear for funeral and memorial services. I'm glad your daughter is recovering well following her booster jab.
ReplyDeleteIt is a nice theme for a memorial service, isn't it? I was happy with my choice of outfit. Thank you, Eileen; my daughter is fully recovered, now. Hope all is well with you, too.
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